I am never quiet
Even when I am silent
I am never alone
Even when I am by myself
I am interlocked with the loudest part of me
A twisted echo in this hollow skull
So incessant that I tried to exorcize it
With 115 grains of holy full metal silence

And even though I “succeeded” in failure
This gaping wound not made yet still remains
When I look in the mirror
I see a Cheshire grinned copy
The hole through his…our head sutured but seeping
And stretching, the fibers are tearing
Where I have languished in grief and heartbreak
This grotesque simulacrum flourishes in that rot

I ruefully make eye contact with this doppelganger
And watch as he peels apart my skin
But to turn away would invite him into reality
So my subconscious insists upon our connection
As if to say drink in all that is you
A mountain of ether
A crown of air
A body of black matter

As the space between us closes in
And becomes too much to bear
He begins to sing a siren call
So loud that I cannot keep myself intact
I am degloving to the sound of cracking glass
But if I were to just give in and collapse
I would shed this self directed agnosia
Our voices would finally resonate as one and maybe then I will finally be quiet

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